Oh The Joy

Words can not begin to describe how full my heart is, and pictures can not do justice to the perfectness that is our little Ben. It amazes me how just a few short days ago I questioned my ability to love another child. Yet now I realize that love doesn't divide with more children, instead it multiplies. Not only do I have love beyond words for Ben, yet my love for Wyatt, seeing him as a big brother, has grown as well.

I had heard it from so many people, but now I see how true it is, the moment Ben entered this world, Wyatt grew up. His gentle kisses and constant concern for his little brother melts me, and it makes my heart soar with pride to have such a wonderful son, and role model for Ben to look up to.

My labor with Ben took us all by surprise, and I have to admit we were a little unprepared as I thought I still had a couple more weeks left! Tuesday afternoon I started having contractions, not painful, and not regular, just there. They lasted on and off for the next 24 hours. Never too painful and sometimes 4-6 minutes apart, and sometimes stopping for hours at a time. Wednesday afternoon at my doctors advising we headed to the hospital to be checked out since my contractions were close, just not painful. Of course when we arrived they stopped completely! I was prepared to be sent home, but after they monitored the baby and checked me they told me I was 6-7cm dilated already! They decided to keep me because they thought things would go quickly from there, although I was preparing myself for a long road ahead. About 6pm my doctor came in and broke my water. I was still feeling ok and after telling Justin how hungry I was he went and snuck me some peanut M&Ms from the vending machine. Suddenly about 15 minutes later, I could care less about those contraband M&Ms. My contractions were coming in threes, each one progressively worse with about 30 seconds in between the triplet pattern. I instantly felt like this was more painful then all 18 hours of my labor with Wyatt. About 7:30pm I felt like I couldn't do this anymore. I asked to be checked for progress so then I could make a decision on trying something for pain. The nurse told me I was at 8cm, so too far for IV pain meds. I then had another contraction so she was waiting for it to end so we could finish discussing any relief when I told her I have to push. Obviously she was not convinced that anything had changed in the past couple minutes and kept talking to me, I then told her, "I can't not push!" My doctor, who had just finished a delivery next door, happened to pop his head in, and came over quickly to check me and quickly announced to get another nurse in here and get things set up. My body took over, and let me tell you what a powerful feeling that was. In one short contraction and only 3 pushes, Benjamin was laid on my chest. I was in complete shock that he was here already, that it even took me a good minute to see if we had a boy or girl!! Things happened so quickly that we hadn't had a chance to call family so the only one there besides Justin and I was his Mom, who had just happened to come a few minutes earlier. However after a few phone calls we were surrounded by the ones we love, all to help welcome baby Ben to the world.

I am definitely outnumbered in our family now, but I feel so blessed to have my three wonderful boys in my life, and right now, I could not ask for more.